Sunday, March 13, 2011

Doughnut Touch

DOUGHNUT TOUCH

A One-Act Play

By

Roger Gonzalez

Copyright © [2011] 9415 Olympic Blvd

By Roger Gonzalez Pico Rivera, California, 90660

(562) 639-7264

DOUGHNUT TOUCH

CAST OF CHARACTERS

Ward. 31. A strict manager at a common place office.

Francesca. 21. A Lazy worker at a common place office.

The Time

The present. Spring.

The Place

A common bland office anywhere there are bland common offices.

DOUGHNUT TOUCH

ACT ONE

SCENE ONE

SETTING: There are several workers working hastily, except for Francesca, in their cubicles. Francesca’s desk is the most adorned and cluttered with papers. Ward’s desk is clean and streamline and far from the rest of the desks.

AT RISE: all the workers, except Francesca, are huddled around Ward’s desk. One by one they all go back to their own desks with a smile and a doughnut in hand.

WARD

Does anyone want another doughnut? We have got plenty left!

(Francesca hastily raises her hand)

Anyone?

(Francesca raises her hand higher)

Well, good job team. I thought we weren’t going to make the quota this time around, but we ended up pulling through! Enjoy, you have earned those doughnuts.

(Francesca marches towards his desk)

FRANCESCA

What’s the big deal? Why did everyone else get a doughnut and not me?! It’s like my existence in this office wasn’t even acknowledged!

WARD

Quite frankly, Francesca, you practically don’t exist in this office.

FRANCESCA

(offended)

What-What do you mean?

WARD

What I mean is; you don’t contribute anything to this office. Your sales this quarter were almost nonexistent. Your desk is always a mess; you are usually late, under slept, and lazy. Not to mention you dress like a slob.

FRANCESCA

You certainly are a nicer boss when you are just giving me orders. I am glad I didn’t ever try to have a conversation with you; I didn’t think you were such a fake person Ward.

WARD

I do what I have to; unlike you… You catch more busy bees with honey, but since I found out you are a fly I have decided to lay out the vinegar.

FRANCESCA

Jeez! I didn’t know you disliked me so much. If you hate me so, how come I haven’t been fired?

WARD

If I could fire you I would, but since we have that contract with students my hands are tied while your buzzing annoys me.

FRANCESCA

I am not a fly!

WARD

You take from this world and give nothing just like one. You, Francesca, embody everything I loathe.

FRANCESCA

That’s a bit harsh… I may not be the best worker here, but that’s because I am studying and I am always under a lot of stress. Can I just get a doughnu-

WARD

-I see you come in here with club bracelets, hung over; you don’t even bother to get rid of the smell of alcohol from your breath. What stress could you possibly have?

FRANCESCA

School mostly, I have also got rent and tuition to pay you know. If I didn’t have to be in this god forsaken place I wouldn’t, but it barely pays for rent.

WARD

You’re an art major from what I read in your resume, how hard could that be? I bet you aren’t getting good grades and have received scores of warnings from your college. I also bet that’s the reason you are paying so much for tuition.

FRANCESCA

My dreams and aspirations are of no concern to you! I am going to get out of here one day and- and, I am going to give this world a lot more than what this company gives it.

WARD

The world doesn’t need your shitty art; it’s fine with you just being a fly.

FRANCESCA

Fine, whatever you say… I am just fly. Can I just get a freaking doughnut?

WARD

You WOULD give up so easily. No, you cannot have a doughnut.

FRANCESCA

It’s just a doughnut

WARD

These belong to hard workers, and I don’t see any.

FRANCESCA

I haven’t eaten anything all day. To be honest I haven’t eaten in four days because I ran out of money. I am just waiting on my financial aid check to clear an-

WARD

No

FRANCESCA

I am starving!

WARD

So is half the world, and most of them deserve to eat.

FRANCESCA

This is stupid Ward, just give me a doughnut.

WARD

No!

FRANCESCA

Pretty please?

WARD

If you want a doughnut you are going to have to work for it like everyone else. Here, shine my shoes.

FRANCESCA

What?! That’s degrading! No.

WARD

Sometimes you need to humble yourself and do things you don’t want to in order to get what you want Francesca; but I know you are too proud to do so.

FRANCESCA

But…that’s borderline abuse. Just because you make more money than me doesn’t mean you get to treat me this way.

WARD

(Begins to eat a doughnut)

Mmmmm this is so good, it’s a bit crunchy on the outside…but the inside is so fluffy and soft…

(takes another bite)

So sweet and tasty, it’s like an orgasm in my mout-

FRANCESCA

Stop it!

WARD

(Ward takes another bite)

If I had to eat only one thing for the rest of my life it would be this doughnut.

FRANCESCA

Just give me one, you have so many

WARD

I think I am going to eat all of these, they are so delicious!

FRANCESCA

Fine! Only because I am starving…

(gets down on her knees to clean his shoes)

Where is the stuff to clean them?

WARD

(Laughs with a mouthful of doughnuts)

Stuff? Do you mean shoe polish? Is that what you are trying to say? I don’t have any.

FRANCESCA

How am I supposed to clean them?

WARD

Use your spit.

FRANCESCA

Are you serious? Forget this!

(Francesca gets up suddenly, hitting Ward in the chin. Ward begins to gag and signals towards his throat)

FRANCESCA

What’s wrong? Chocking on your own pride?

WARD

(Gurgles unintelligible words)

FRANCESCA

I am sorry, I only speak fly; buzzzz buzzzz

WARD

(stiffens and stays motionless)

FRANCESCA

(She grabs a doughnut and spits on Ward’s shoe.)

My art isn’t shitty.